Sunday, April 24, 2011
I haven't felt this close and comfortable with Sara before. Maybe things will get better after all.
Friday, March 25, 2011
It doesn't take much to trigger the jealous side of me. You crossed the line however, when you openly flirt with my girlfriend. I subtly tell you to back off, but was met with vulgarities from your foul mouth. There's no reason to be defensive. All I did was courteously told him to get the fuck away. I take my relationships seriously. I don't play games. I'm straight to the point. If you wanna mess around with my girl, I'll mess you up too.
Background story:
Some random guy sees Sara's name on a triathlon race result document online and decides to add her on facebook. No doubt she feels weirded out by this, but the strange thing is that she continues chatting with him online, putting up with his nonsense of pretending to be interested in triathlons and training when it's obviously a disguise for trying to woo her. A weird-ass fucker randomly adds you, being all nice and shit, and you bought it. I thought you're better than that Ra..
Friday, March 11, 2011
Blog Revival
I guess I just need a place to release all my usually suppressed feelings again. What better way than to do it than in the open privacy of cyberspace.
If you view life as a long struggle, then love is one of the many battles you will inevitably get involved in. Well, unless you're the privileged few who has been dealt a soulmate by the unfair hands of fate. Soulmates. Do you chance upon them by some unexpected scenario? Or are they created, through years of quiet bonding and understanding, of unrelentless love and acceptance? Many in their idle daydreams, have longed to have themselves swept away by that special someone at first sight. Well, if that were to happen, what would the relationship be based on? Everything superficial, right?
If you view life as a long struggle, then love is one of the many battles you will inevitably get involved in. Well, unless you're the privileged few who has been dealt a soulmate by the unfair hands of fate. Soulmates. Do you chance upon them by some unexpected scenario? Or are they created, through years of quiet bonding and understanding, of unrelentless love and acceptance? Many in their idle daydreams, have longed to have themselves swept away by that special someone at first sight. Well, if that were to happen, what would the relationship be based on? Everything superficial, right?
Things between Sara and me have been emotionally challenging these past couple of months. Even the slightest of arguments can quake our already fragile relationship. It's been 3 days since our last fight, and we haven't talked or texted since. She says it's my certainty of where the relationship is going that scares her. Well, it spooks me out too. I've never felt this way about a person before, and I'm doubting myself on whether these feelings are genuine or not. I think she feels that we've moving things too fast. Honestly, I think we have been skipping so many bases, that even though we've reached the end, it leaves both parties unsatisfied.
The stubborn majority of me refuses to believe that this is the end, but to place any rational reason behind it, I just can't find one. What I know is that I'll never give up trying.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Post-BMT
Two weeks in SISPEC has already passed without much affair. All we did was attend lectures, view demonstrations and then pass the technical handling tests immediately afterwards, live firing and IPPT. It's comforting to have the guys from my platoon in BMT as my section mates. At least with familiar faces around, trust, friendship and brotherhood can be further reinforced. The culture here in SISPEC is a distinct contrast from BMTC, with the latter being extremely rigid in terms of discipline, conduct and regimentation. The food, much more tastier than the ones served in Tekong, but I guess it's only a matter of time before I go through the whole meal rotation list and then eventually get sick of digesting the same old stuff day after day.
Being in love is a wonderful thing. You try to take a step back and try to comprehend this feeling, but trust me, you would be better off just going with the flow. I'm doing all I can to avoid past mistakes, because the last thing I would wanna do is to hurt her. I want to make her feel like she's the luckiest girl in the world, make her feel loved and wanted. How I go about doing that, however, is something that I still couldn't find an answer for.
Maybe I'm just too full of inflated expectations, trying so hard all this while to live up to a fucking blueprint of how a perfect relationship should work. At the end of the day, one feels only emptiness and doubtful of the meanings behind those acts of affection, which seem nothing else but mere formality that is expected of you when you don that "attached" status. I would be lying to myself if I said I've never questioned the sincerity of this relationship. Bleargh..
Being in love is a wonderful thing. You try to take a step back and try to comprehend this feeling, but trust me, you would be better off just going with the flow. I'm doing all I can to avoid past mistakes, because the last thing I would wanna do is to hurt her. I want to make her feel like she's the luckiest girl in the world, make her feel loved and wanted. How I go about doing that, however, is something that I still couldn't find an answer for.
Maybe I'm just too full of inflated expectations, trying so hard all this while to live up to a fucking blueprint of how a perfect relationship should work. At the end of the day, one feels only emptiness and doubtful of the meanings behind those acts of affection, which seem nothing else but mere formality that is expected of you when you don that "attached" status. I would be lying to myself if I said I've never questioned the sincerity of this relationship. Bleargh..
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Adjusting to Regimentation
Roughly 3 more weeks to go until POP and I'm not sure whether I should feel elated or sad about it. The past 6 weeks have been a throughly enjoyable experience. In such a short timespan, I fired 70+ live rounds and 300+ blanks, thrown a live grenade, got PBs for my 2.4km run, cried during an unexpectedly emotional moment in Field Camp, marched 12km in Full Battle Order (FBO), learned how to throw punches and kicks and rifle fighting, and met tons of people from various backgrounds.
The only High Key events left are the 16km and 24km route marches and IPPT. 16km route march is next Wednesday just before book out, while IPPT's on next Tuesday evening. The start of the 24km route march would be just 8-9 hours before POP, how awesome..
The only High Key events left are the 16km and 24km route marches and IPPT. 16km route march is next Wednesday just before book out, while IPPT's on next Tuesday evening. The start of the 24km route march would be just 8-9 hours before POP, how awesome..
Friday, October 02, 2009
Awww....
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Countdown to Significant Events
60 more days to BMT.
52 more days to my last day (tentative) at Running Lab.
20 more days to Run NUS 2009.
16 more days to Mom's Birthday.
13 more days to Legs and Paddles 2009.
5 more days to being SSC's guinea pig.
1 more day to NINE INCH NAILS concert.
52 more days to my last day (tentative) at Running Lab.
20 more days to Run NUS 2009.
16 more days to Mom's Birthday.
13 more days to Legs and Paddles 2009.
5 more days to being SSC's guinea pig.
1 more day to NINE INCH NAILS concert.
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